12. Pfadher O'XTC

THIS SECTION CONTAINS MATERIAL THAT IS UNSUITED FOR PERVERTS. IF YOU WANT TO READ IT, IT IS AT YOUR OWN DISCRETION.

THIS SECTION CONTAINS MATERIAL THAT MIGHT BE DIFFICULT TO READ FOR PEOPLE WHO SUFFERED AS CHILDREN UNDER THE HANDS OF PERVERTS, PAEDOPHILES, AND SOCIETY. READER IS AT HER/HIS OWN DISCRETION. WE STRONGLY SUGGEST THAT YOU READ IT. I'M JUST TRYING TO SAY THAT YOU'RE NEVER ALONE.

"Little child,
looking so pretty.
Come out and play,
I'll be your Daddy.
Innocent child,
looking so sweet.
Rape your mind,
and now your flesh I reap
You raped.
I feel dirty.
It hurt.
As a child.
Tied down.
"That's a good boy.""

Korn (Daddy)

      This is a subject that gets to me all the time. And something i've never experienced directly. But it seems like everyone around me has. My cousin Julie was raped by skinheads, her first boyfriend, and her older brother, Steven. My friend Andi, was raped as a young boy. My uncle was arrested for paedophilia. I mean these things go on around me and i don't understand.

      Who are these fucking perverts who need kiddie-cock or kid-cunts? Kryst i mean something got to be done in this society. In a way you could say i did, wantingly take part in such actions. I had sex with my brother between the ages of 12-16, but that's different coz i fucking wanted too.

      Julie's brother was 24 when he raped her, she was only 15 at the time. I not sure on the details' coz she avoids the subject like the plague, but she told me that it happened when her parents were away on vacation. She was at home watching tv, when Steven came home from a bad date. His gyrlfriend had dumped him, and he was bloody pissed, and she believes he was drunk. Steven was a heavy drinker. Supposedly what happened...how'd i find out, well we're cousins, and we'd have sex every once and a while, then toke up and talk, i was half stoned, but i've got a strong mind...anyway he stumbled to the couch, screaming at her, like she was his gyrlfriend, calling her every name in the book. Julie tells me he was crying. He fell on her and started to grab her tits and kiss her. Now Julie's a big strong gyrl, she can take on most men, but i think she pitied him...BFM. So he's grasping her, then he sticks his hand up her skirt. She had too much so she punches him. He had to be on something coz he punches her back, and pulls off her panties. She said she tried to fight, but she didn't have all her will into it, it was her brother, so she gave up, letting him take her. He fucked her good too. She didn't see anyone for almost two weeks. She didn't go on a date with a man for nearly two years. And worst of all he said he forgot, yeah right.

      Last year, a couple of months after her boyfriend had an OD on acid, she was raped by one of his 'friends'. A guy they knew when they hung out with the Cult Waethe Hlammachar. The guy who raped her was the first black neo-nazi skinhead i ever saw, his name Peter-Anthony. Mean mother fucker. He, and his gang of "WASP" cunts grabbed her from behind and said that since Jim was into sleeping with guys that she'd have to be raped like a fag...in the ass. Let's just say she hasn't recovered from that one yet. She's in therapy and on medication. As for Peter-Anthony, i showed him something that all neo-nazi faggots deserve, to be raped in the ass...with a baseball bat. And i ain't lying. He's probably still at home, tryin' to get it out of his intestines. "Burning Inside!"

      Andi's been through hell to, but i've promised i wouldn't talk much about it. But if, you've ever read his work, you'd understand what has happened to him. Nuff said, i don't want to get in trouble with him.

      I've heard stories on the news about a man who raped his daughter, then he left, and her stepfather raped her as well. That is disturbing, and the only thing i heard from Mike, was that "I guess she opened up to them." He's still looking for his teeth.

      I've noticed that most people don't have sympathy for people who get raped. Lots of pity, no fucking sympathy. When a gyrl gets raped by her father, they say she let herself. When she gets raped by a boyfriend, he says "Her 'no's meant yes." When it's a stranger it always, that she teased him, or she deserved it. When a guy gets raped by a man, it's because he was a faggot. And if he's raped by a gyrl, he's still a faggot, a weak pussy who couldn't defend himself against a pitiful womyn.

      But i will say there are some of us, gyrlz, who almost deserve to get raped. They walk on that thin line and say men are always putting them down or telling lewd joke, so they charge him with sexual harassment. Listen SH isn't a tool to destroy men, it something that was supposed to save people from, like it says S-E-X-U-A-L H-A-R-R-A-S-S-M-E-N-T. This cunt once told me that a guy at school called her "a fucked up cunt", so she charged him with SH, and won. And guess what, she really is a F'd up Kunt. Listen, i don't think, us gals should use SH so much, if a guy harasses me, i'll knock out a few teeth, and remove his prostate, simple and effective.

      One thing we both, Andi and myself, believe in is that rapists, paedophiles, and other disgusting perverts, no matter how old they are, should be permanently scarred, like what they did to their victims. I'm not only talking about castration, I'm also talking about having their nipples ripped off, their head branded as perverts, and given, an anal cleansing with rubbing alcohol. This isn't a rule, but for the really big perverts it should be seriously considered at least.

      I want to mention, that i don't believe everyone is wrong when it comes to paedophilia. Something about it has a bizarre appeal to a lot of people. To sleep with a younger person. But their should be some restrictions. I'll sleep with a 15-year old gyrl, and that's how low Andi'd go. But beyond that it's simply sick.

      But i can't really talk about any of this since it never really happened to me. I know how sensitive you people get when others' take on your defense, so i'll say only one more thing. You ain't ever fucking alone. Even people like me who haven't truly felt your pain, if you help us, we can learn to understand and even help. None of us are...oh fuck i'll just shut up now coz i ain't getting anywhere. So to you perverts out there i have one thing to say. If you ever mess with anyone i know, i will find you...

13. SODOMy, A strait secret... THE LIES...

"But he insisted so strongly that they did go with him and entered his house. He prepared a meal for them, baking bread without yeast, and they ate. Before they had gone to bed, all the men from every part of Sodom -- both young and old -- surrounded the house. They called to Lot, "Where are the men that came to you tonight? Bring them out to us so that we can have sex with them."

"Do not lie with a man as one lies with a woman; that is detestable."

"In the same way the men also abandoned natural relations with women and were inflamed with lust for one another. Men committed indecent acts with other men, and received in themselves the due penalty for their perversion."

"Do you not know that the wicked will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Nighter the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor male prostitutes nor homosexual offenders nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. And that is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God."

      Don't believe all you read in books kids, they just want to scare you straight but if you're a religious nut then you already know where to stick your holy...

14. TANKGyrl

      I love TANKGyrl. I am TANKGyrl. I've got every comic, and the movie. The t-shirts, the panties, the posters, the strips of latex, the condoms, the socks, the boots, the hat, the strap-on dildos, the vibrators, the album, the tank, and i've got her, hiding in my closet.

      I want to make love to TANKGyrl. I want to hold her and squeeze her and eat her and drink her and bite her and to dominate her...wait she's probably the dominant one...to be her slave...ohhh GOD someone give her to me.

      She's my hero.

      This one wasn't very long, but i wanted you to know how much i loved her, and if you ever see her, could you tell her that i want to make passionate, hot, sticky love to her.

15. s e e a f m l k l t l a i y SKAeLETHAL PfAMYLY

      I've been listening to music for a really long fucking time. I can remember the first 'punk' album i ever bought. This was back when punk meant something. It was back on my 12th b-day party. This was in 1986, i got a copy of The Royal French Artists self-titled 7in. It sucked, but, like all real punk, it was fun. I didn't give a shit if they sucked, i liked the mindset of the recording. Seemingly enough, the more i listened, the more i hated it. I still have it in my collection, scratched, and chipped, and it still sucks. The band broke up in 92, but i did open for them once.

      The world changes, the 80's were covered in New Wave, not horrible, but still. Thanks to my brother, i got a good chance to sample the real undercurrent New Wave bands, now labelled as Goth. My brother loved bands like The Sisters Of Mercy, The Mission, Ghost Dance (originally Skeletal Family). He saw most of them live. And i was always with him. Actually my first live show was The Sister Of Mercy, though i can't remember who opened.

      Now, i don't know, we ain't got anything to look at. Scenes barely last more than a year, and seem to get mainstream very quickly. Almost as if the norms were starving for the underground. Of course since everyone who's successful claims to be bisexual, i can understand it a bit.

      Since i just put my foot into the bloody cunt of bisexuality, i'll give you my point of view. If it exists, then we're all bisexual. If it doesn't, then those who claim it, are still stuck in their fucking closet.

      To continue the original topic, music in general sucks. There are only a few good bands, and they ain't at the top of the record charts. They haven't sold out. Sex Pistols have always sucked, but they never sold out (until now, greedy little fucks). Most great bands exist only in their fans. Kryst, any band i listen to, can never get big or i'll stop listening to them. And i'm not alone. If karknal knoledge ever gets big i'm leaving and starting something else. I need the fucking money, but $ ain't my God. My God is my cunt, that's all i fucking need, Nuff Said.

16. PFUNCK

      Pfunck: a man, woman or child who is proud of her(him)self no matter what's going on in her/his life.

      Pfunck: abbreviation for Punk Fuck.

      Punk Fuck: any alternative lifestyle that is not fucking accepted by the mainstream,

      Punk Fuckers: people who are really fucking cool to be around, and who don't cause mass boredom.

      Pfuncker: same as above, but just a bloody more polite way of calling it.

      What the fuck are you looking at whore? I'm not a piece of meat for you to ridicule. The mainstreamer can eat my cunt puss, before i ever sink down to their 'norms'. Damn losers.

      Last night i got a letter from my brother, Trevor, who's now living in Amsterdam, lucky bastard. My brother lives in Amsterdam with his boyfriend and gyrlfriend, Jonathan & Anne-Marie. Now i've heard of complex relationships, but my brother takes the cake. Coz his boyfriend has a gyrlfriend, and his gyrlfriend has a gyrlfriend. Wait maybe i can simplify this fucking thing. Trevor goes out with Jonathan & Anne-Marie. Jonathan goes out with Trevor & Marie-Isabelle. And Anne-Marie goes out with Trevor & Marie-Isabelle. It forms a complex circle, or some other demented shape. But Trevor also goes out with Marie-Isabelle. And Jonathan & Anne-Marie go out together. And add a fuck buddy for each, and you've got a mess. In parentheses, next to each name is what sexual orientation they each claim to be from; (G) Gay, (L) Lesbian, (B) Bisexual, (S) Straight, (A) Asexual, (K) Confused.

17. Sir kiss Klownz & serkyss Freakss

Andi's got to be the coolest guy i've ever met. Naw, i'm lying, actually he scares me. He wrote a story that bothers me about his sexual perversions. The story was called "Jimmy", about a sociopath kid, read it. Andi's a weird little queer. The fact is he's a lot like me.

What else can i say. Andi's new and original. This isn't a psyche profile, just a look into the mind of a child killer. Never mind. Andi's got some strange friends, who go by strange names. I guess we all, i mean Kris with a 'K'. Anyway his friend name as i know him is DJ Pfyst-Pfukk. Guess what, another artist? No big surprise, artists seem to find each other, like moths to a light, or the way depressed people generally become a depressed community.

I sometimes think Andi belongs in a circus. He'd be an interesting freak. Neat sideshow. "Ladies! And Gentlemen! In the centre ring, the amazing ANDI, and his multiple personalities!"

18. Tin Cunts & Plastic Omens

"Throw your mind away,
fall into the sea,
There's nothing solid here,
dissolve your body today.
There's a sun in the sky,
we're in the atmosphere,
throw yourself in the sea,
there's nothing solid down here.
Mind/Body/Light/Sound/Mind/Bodyless/Soundless/Light."
Swans (Mind/Body/Light/Sound)

      You know i get way too much fucking flak about the way i look. Yeah, so my nipples are stretched. So what!? I don't get the big deal about all the fucking importance of other people's appearance. Yeah i know, it man's right to judge, but fuck the judging. If we weren't so critical, i'd bet there'd be a lot less poseurs. You know, white rappers, who live in the West Islands or Laval, who think they lived the hard life coz their parents ain't got the money to buy their stuff anymore. Or cheesy young rave kids with their plastic chains, but no sense of identity, but always full of attitude. Listen if a bitch, gives me attitude, like he's number one, i give him my boot to sit on for a while. Let me tell you, 20+ docs may be out, but no one's has forgotten what they stand for. Pride. Boots up. Pride. There are a lot of pussies out there who buy the boots, steel-toe and all, and wear their pants over them. Why?! If you're going to spend the $ on boots then wear'em properly.

      Body piercing has been 'in' for the last couple of years. Well 'normal' piercing anyway. You know: the ears, the navel, one nipple (not both), the eyebrow (for boyz) and the nose (for gyrlz); occasionally the tongue, but that's still quite hard for people to stomach. But these same people seem to find other places more shocking, less sociable. I can't understand the 'people'. I mean if you're willing to accept piercing then accept it all the fucking way. I getting real pissed, by peoples faces when they look at me. I have more then i can count on both ears, though more prominently on the right ear, both nipples are done, the septum, that place between both nostrils, a ring on the upper-lip, two rings on the lower-lip, my navel, a barbell over my left eye, and a ring over the right, my tongue is pierced, one on my clitoral hood, and four on the vaginal lips. Yes, these may make you squeamish, but i've had them long enough to know, that they haven't changed my personality.

      Biggest question i ever got, WHY DID YOU PIERCE YOURSELF ON THE ___________ (fill the blank)? Well, this will be the answer of all answers. I did it to satisfy my personal sexual needs. Everyone has this need. Deep inside yourself there is a need which surpasses, all the others. It's stronger then your usual sexual need, this one drive's people to enlarge their breasts or cocks. We all want to achieve our personal image of God, i'm not there yet, but i'm close.

      Oh and if you want to know about tattoos, i've spent great deals of $ to decorate my living corpse. My back has a Giger-esque type image, i have a pattern on the right side of my skull, another down my left arm, a spiderweb intermingled with a Baphomet between my breasts; an inverted pentagram on my left asscheek, and another demonic tattoo starting inches away from my vagina and descending down to my ankles. They're all quite demonic or Celtic or tribal. No roses, or birds, or crap cute stuff, which would have been a waste of my time and money.

      Getting crap like that tattooed on your body is idiotic. It's like dying your hair without bleaching it. You're telling the world that you can't handle being real, so you want to make a fool out of yourself. I respect people who admit it. Who admit that they're afraid or uncomfortable of being noticed all the time, instead of trying to be a fake.

      To all the fakes out there, GET A LIFE.

ed. note: You know what I do when I get a fucking cold? I blow my nose... what the fuck do you do?

19. pfuck ys What U've Got 2 Say When U Want Y'er Gyrl 2 Be In Y'er Bed With u

Last night i got back from work late. Sam was sleeping on the couch, and Mike was out. I had this really bad feeling in the pit of my stomach that something was up. And i was right. In my room, Syl was laying naked, on top of a guy. There was a needle on the floor near them. Now this is great. Not only did she fuck a guy, but she did heroin, IN MY ROOM! She doesn't pay enough rent to do that. But strange as it seems, i didn't wake them, i just leaned against the door and stared at her. Why is it, that she is still so beautiful, after fucking her body up this badly?

Anyway i think i stood there for an hour, half asleep. Then the guy started to wake and he saw me. I looked at him angrily at first, then i lost my nerve. I can't believe what happened. I stood there with tears in my eyes. And i couldn't fight them back. He looked at me. He knew.

I don't know, things got really strange. He got up, stark naked, and comforted me. Now i've been comforted by junkies before, but never by a naked punk. He was clean. Must have taken a shower before having sex with my gyrl.

So we're standing there, he's hugging me, and i've got a boner pressing against my thighs. And then i did a revolting thing. I kissed him on the lips, opened lips, tongue to tongue. I took him to Sam's room, and we fucked on the bed. And yes i used condoms. Don't want any junky germs. To tell the truth it felt weird having a penis inside me. It's been nearly 8 years since i was fucked for the last time by Trevor. I didn't go down on him, but he did on me. He performed oral on me like most gyrlz i've been with, i never knew guys could be that good. I don't know how long it lasted.

When i awoke in the morning, the punk was gone. Syl was still sleeping, but it looked like they did it again. I joined her in bed, and we made love. She was blasted out of her mind with sex and drugs, but i didn't care. I don't think i'd do it again, though, it felt good, but wasn't great. Listen, i think sex should remain between lovers. But the occasional fuck-friend, should always be around somewhere, just to remind you of whom you belong to.

20. Slytz, Tytz, Clytz...POWER??????

      So you think i'm a feminist, eh? Well go on keep thinking it, i'm not. No fucking way. Not that feminism is bloody wrong, just a bunch of stuffed- up men haters, doesn't make for great company. I like guys, they're ridiculous. I enjoy their company, and if they insult me, i treat them with a manly punch to the gut (sometimes bellow the gut). Simple, men don't ask for any more. Maybe, that's why i only really get along with straight boys.

      Feminism is full of shit now a days, no one seems to know what it stands for anymore. Don't ask me, don't even ask'em, coz they ain't smart enough to figure it. Most of 'em that i know are in it to discriminate against guys. Don't get me wrong, i'm not sexist, i just practice my own form of feminism. I think all of us gyrlz do, just i don't want a cult of womyn behind me.

This is my hierarchy of world domination: